Job & men choices...decisions decisions!

Dear David,
I have a very unusual problem. I have been interviewing as I wish to change my job. I now have two excellent offers and I am torn as to which to take. Also, I am seeing two men, both of whom I have something going with. I am at a point where I must choose between one or the other. What an unusual quandary, I know. Too much of a good thing. Please, help me decide!
~B. Baffled

Dear B. Baffled,
De-Baffle yourself. You have come to the right place. I have two set rules, and actually perfect for just these situations. When taking a job, take the one that pays the most. Definitely. They are all very much the same finally. And when deciding between men, date the younger. Don't ask me why- just do it. I have made both these decisions a number of times. This is what experience has taught me.

Handsomest Man in the World ~ Why it's ME!

Guess who is Handsomest Man in the World this week? It’s ME my darlings. I have new publicity stills from the magical David Vance. The gray jacket is a couture item from Paree. Don’t hate me.
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Dear David,
I have just taken a new job and suddenly I don’t feel my usual confident self. Any suggestions on how to keep up a brave front?
~A Little Down

Dear Little Down,
Up, my dear, up! You know that I always say that when we awake in the dark we are always seventeen. Full of self-doubts. You just haven’t been there long enough to show those folks how capable you are and yet so calm and funny and human at the same time. I also say, “The trick is not caring.” You’re just in a new job. Keep your emotions for your private life. Do not worry about what they will think of you. Concern yourself that you are really doing a good job. And as long as you are doing your best you can think well of yourself. When I worked for Revlon I used to say, “We brought them caviar and they just wanted peanut butter. So we’ll just give them peanut butter.” Do a really good job and then you can take it down a notch for those uncomprehending bosses.