Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Who Wears Short Shorts?

Today I'm in the mood to talk about fashion. Men's fashion. I have just come from Lincoln Road in Miami Beach where the subject of men's shorts cannot be avoided. Fortunately I have just had this query.

This is such a good subject. Because men don't wear their shorts much of the year except here in Miami they tend to remain in their wardrobe for years. Even decades. You can tell a gay man's age easily here by just checking the length of their shorts.

The more mature in short shorts and usually paired with black oxfords and pull up black socks are certainly from the 1950's. I think the last time we wore short shorts, although I see from the fashion magazines they are returning.

Then there are those tennis length shorts paired with sneakers and sweat socks pulled up tightly. The preppy look from the 1970's. Ralph Lauren may have captured it permanently but not that shorts' length.

I could also mention the too-long "pedal-pushers." Or "clam-diggers." You know, that mid-calf look that really doesn't work on anyone. They were big for women in the 1960's. Beats me how they made a comeback for men.

You can also have that below the knee "surfer-dude" look but I think only kids on surfboards get away with it as they are usually clinging slightly below where their public hairs begin. I don't recommend that for the sophisticated.

Your shorts should be just above your knee. Where they are out of the way if you are on a bike. And don't reveal too much thigh, which may not be your best feature. Even if you have great legs, don't advertise it. It looks so desperate.

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